That was humiliating

I decided that before class yesterday, I would walk the track at the Y first. Not fast and not a lot.. just enough to warm up my major leg muscles. Our warm-ups are often not long enough for me since I’ve been so sedentary.

My mistake was not hydrating myself. I should have brought water, but didn’t.

Halfway through class I had to ask to leave to get a drink. My heart was pounding so hard it was scaring me and I could feel my mouth drying up.

Sensei asked “Do you really need to?”

I was so mortified… I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t think I was going to blow a gasket.. he let me go, but I was very embarassed that I didn’t take care of myself before…

Then I almost kicked the kid next to me doing side snap kicks. And I was so surprised that I started giggling.. my stress response is to giggle or cry. I prefer giggiling.

Sensei reminded me to keep my focus. Then I made another mistake and tried to explain myself.. Doh!

Sensei then told me that it was ok to make mistakes, that’s how we learn. Funny, that’s how I train my dogs too…

It was a hard class for me.. oddly, physically it wasn’t as bad.. mostly it was the mental challenges and I didn’t realize it until it was too late.

I’ll do better on Saturday.